This is the first in a series of random excerpts from the Highland Park ISD Student Code of Conduct:
When a student under the age of ten engages in behavior that is expellable behavior, the student shall not be expelled, but shall be placed in a [disciplinary alternative education program]. A student under age six shall not be placed in a DAEP unless the student commits a federal firearm offense.
I’m trying to imagine one of those cute kindergartners I saw on the first day of school committing a federal firearms offense. But I can’t.